No One Will Ever Get Out of This World Alive

Dave Kanicki is the Executive Editor of Farm Equipment magazine.  The Farm Equipment weekly newsletter is a must read for me, since it always has something interesting and relevant to our core business.  This week, I followed the link to Dave's blog.  The Resolutions below are good advice for everyone, even though "wise men don't need advice and fools won't heed it."   It is with Dave's permission that I publish this.   ----rich

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I’ve never been a big believer in resolutions for the sake of making resolutions, particularly as an old year comes to an end and new year approaches. On the other hand, I came across something in 1975 that has remained in my “Food for Thought” file since then, and which I make a point of reading at least once a year.
It spoke to me then and continues to speak to me about things in life I often forget to remember, and what’s important and what’s not.
It just happens to be called “Resolutions” and was penned by the late newspaper columnist Lloyd Shearer. 
As this is my last editor’s blog for 2012, it seems it would be as good a time as any to share it with you.


Resolutions
No one will ever get out of this world alive.
Resolve therefore to maintain a sense of values.
Take care of yourself. Good health is everyone’s major source of wealth. Without it, happiness is almost impossible.
Resolve to be cheerful and helpful. People will repay you in kind.
Avoid angry, abrasive persons. They are generally vengeful.
Avoid zealots. They are generally humorless.
Resolve to listen more and talk less. No one ever learns anything by talking.
Be chary of giving advice. Wise men don’t need it and fools won’t heed it.
Resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and the wrong. Sometime in life you will have been all of these.
Do not equate money with success. There are many successful moneymakers who are miserable failures as human beings. What counts most about success is how one achieves it.

Thanks for making 2012 such a great year. There’s no doubt in my mind that 2013 will be even better. 

Dave Kanicki,
Executive Editor
Farm Equipment
dkanicki@lesspub.co

Newtown Aftermath

This post is outside the arena of most of my notes, but because of the information I received from my cousin, I felt it would be of interest to regular readers of "Notes"

Yesterday (Monday) I did a blog post about some of my concerns following the Newtown shootings.  I have had some dialog and email exchanges with some of my friends and relatives as a result.  If you want to read yesterday's post, click on the OneEmptyChair link at the top of the right hand column.

I had long and insightful letter from my cousin overnight.  Her father was a prominent child psychiatrist in a major northwestern US city, her husband was a psychiatrist, her brother was a psychiatrist, and she was a psychiatric social worker.  Lots of experience there!

I am providing a few quotes from her letter.
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"I will tell you what I think from a psychiatric perspective which John, my dad, brother and myself have all worked in the field for many years."

She then related that basically, during the 1970's, the medicine and treatment methods advanced to the point where many disturbed people could be effectively treated without being locked up in prisons or security mental institutions.  Families and the legal system could essentially force people to have treatment as a condition for not being incarcerated. 

"This was a very good thing but" (in the 1980's) "the 'advocates' got into the act and sued doctors and specifically the state to say that no one could be forced to take medication as part of their treatment or a condition for living on their own.

 

The legal procedures for anything other than a brief hold are now almost impossible"

  

So, in spite of effective treatment being available, it is often not provided to those who need it the most, because they refuse to be treated  and no one can force them to be treated.

"All of this has resulted in a system which basically doesn't protect or provide a safety net for the people afflicted with mental illness nor does it protect families and communities from those afflicted.

We need a return to common sense and personalized treatment."   With current health care practice regulations  "and what is to come, neither common sense or personalized treatment will be part of the equation.

I feel that early treatment, continuing treatment and continuity of care as well as education to families and community is what will keep people the safest but sadly I see no advocates for returning to some of the things that most helped those ill and protected society when I first entered the scene in the 1970's.

 

More rules and regulations won't help what I'm talking about. Possibly revisions/improvements will come from individuals in communities that can make changes in their local laws, fight them to the top of the court system and gradually spread the change.

 

Just increasing money to towards mental health programs will be, as Rich said, another bandaid. "

 

We need real change. 


I agree with Jean this should not be a partisan political issue.  These are changes that don't need more money.
______________________________________end of letter.

Note from Rich----

Currently, a huge wave of hysteria seems to be overcoming us.  My wife substitute taught yesterday at our local school, which was all locked except for the front door.  Parents were walking their kids into the school and even to the classroom.  In another area school, individual classroom doors were locked and windows blacked out.  In this emotion charged national atmosphere, there is no telling what “reforms” will be put in place.  I, too, hope this is not politicized. 

Read the comment below for more insight.

Let them keep their dignity

How I learned a life lesson at the expense of Mr. Jones   ---- that is what I will call him here.

Years ago, when we started our business, we were selling some agricultural chemicals as a way to generate additional revenue.  My father was an agronomist and had been involved in such businesses before.

We had a man who owed us perhaps $4000 or $5000 for materials he had purchased from us.  I volunteered to go collect since it was not too far from my home.  He had been putting us off for several months, so I was determined to demonstrate my collection abilities and "bring him to justice".

I stopped at his farm on the way home and found him and his young son in the barn, milking cows.   I marched in and without engaging in very much small talk, told Mr. Jones that I was there to collect the money he owed us.  He said he did not have it right then, so I told him I would be back the next night about the same time to collect.  Then I left.

The next night I stopped, went into the barn and  asked, probably not very politely, for the money.  He said, "It is in the house, on the table, my wife is not home.  Go inside and get it. Goodbye."

I got it and left.  Later and many times since then, I have thought about my actions, and have never been proud.  More than anything else, I robbed Mr. Jones of his dignity in front of his son. 

My friend Dave calls these "life lessons" and I have never forgotten this lesson:
Let them keep their dignity.

I have tried, though not with 100% success, to let people keep their dignity and hold their heads up, even when I wanted to break them down for some reason.  That means trying to not attack them as a person, but rather to keep things behavior focused.  It means that in spite of what wrong they may have committed in my eyes, remembering that they are people with feelings, who do not need their self worth downgraded.  It means not reprimanding people in front of others.  (This has sometimes been hard for me, because of a desire at times to make an example of someone.  Other times my own emotions just would not let me wait until a better time.)  The so-called "hot stove rule" speaks of the need for immediacy in discipline, just as a hot stove burns immediately.  How can you have immediacy and still "wait for a better time" ????

Click to learn about the Hot Stove Rule         I first learned about it in 1967 from Don Sheriff (see right hand column of this blog.


Dignity is one of those words that we all have a concept of its meaning, but yet has a variety of definitions.  In this case such terms as "self respect, self esteem, self worth, personal pride, or being worthy of respect, esteem, and honor" used in some of the on-line dictionaries. You can find a lot more such definitions.

Good customer service is where you find it

Recently I visited the Wickham Road Home Depot store in Melbourne, Florida.  It was raining, with some wind, and temperatures in the low 70's.  Not a bad day, though not exactly pleasant.  We picked out some plants in the outside garden center (during a break in the rain).

At the covered checkout counter area in the garden center there were a few employees who were running the registers, joking among themselves, answering customer questions, and waiting for the brief rain to end so they could again venture out to get their work done.  It was busy, but relaxed, and an atmosphere of fun.  One man in particular stood out.  He was joking with all the customers and fellow staff and doing even more than the other staff members in creating a fun atmosphere.

When I went to get our vehicle, my wife waited for me in the checkout area.

She reported that he suggested to one younger couple that the man go get their car while the wife waited so she could stay dry.  While waiting for her husband, the HD staff member tore open a plastic shopping bag to make her an "umbrella" and then ran their purchase out to the car so she could get in more quickly.

These staff members, and this one man in particular, created a positive shopping experience.

Better, said my wife, than any other "big box" DIY store she had visited.

We will be back the next time we are town!